Section 9
Friday, March 14, 2025
The Twelve Days of Sickness
The Twelve Days of Sickness
(to the tune of “The Twelve Days of Christmas”)
On the first day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
An anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the second day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the third day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Two pots of herbal tea
Three healing crystals
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the fourth day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the fifth day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the sixth day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Six hypnotherapy sessions
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the seventh day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Seven holistic dieticians
Six hypnotherapy sessions
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the eighth day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Eight quarantine zones
Seven holistic dieticians
Six hypnotherapy sessions
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the ninth day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Nine iron lungs
Eight quarantine zones
Seven holistic dieticians
Six hypnotherapy sessions
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the tenth day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Ten new pandemics
Nine iron lungs
Eight quarantine zones
Seven holistic dieticians
Six hypnotherapy sessions
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the eleventh day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Eleven plague rats breeding
Ten new pandemics
Nine iron lungs
Eight quarantine zones
Seven holistic dieticians
Six hypnotherapy sessions
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
On the twelfth day of Sickness,
Bobby Jr. gave to me
Twelve brain-worms feeding,
Eleven plague rats breeding
Ten new pandemics
Nine iron lungs
Eight quarantine zones
Seven holistic dieticians
Six hypnotherapy sessions
Five vials of snake oil
Four Ivermectin tablets
Three healing crystals
Two pots of herbal tea
And an anti-vaxxer in a pear tree.
© 2025, Daniel and Marty Fugate
All rights reserved
Wednesday, March 05, 2025
USAWipes!
INT, CHARMIN BEARS’ HOME — DAY
The Charmin Bear family is sitting around talking about toilet paper in their typical loving, jovial, slightly creepy way. ICE agents suddenly blast through the front door, and slap hoods and handcuffs on the bears. Donald Trump walks in behind them.
Trump: (gesturing) Get those Canuck bears outta here.
The ICE agents drag the Charmin Bears away. Trump stands, smiling smugly.
Trump: Canadian toilet paper? That’s over. Done. Let me introduce …
Holds up a four-pack of toilet paper. The package is emblazoned with Trump’s smiling face.
Trump: USAwipesI It’s all-American, people. It’s not soft like Canadian toilet paper. No way. It's made from our great nation’s old-growth forests and shredded government documents. It’s tough. You have to be tough to use it. You have to be American to use it. The right kind of American, OK? No shit.
Friday, July 10, 2009
Palin Considered
I will be posting a longish piece on Sarah Palin in my next post, sort of a "Palin crosses the Rubicon" bit. Basically a "where does she goes from here" piece.
Tonight.
Sunday, June 14, 2009
It's been a long time!
Since then, we've had a near Revolution in Iran . However, I strongly believe the Fascist Circle that runs the country will be successful in maintaining power. Despite the hopes and dreams of the likes of Andrew Sullivan, the grip of the Reactionaries and the White Forces remains too profound. Aside from that fact, the incumbent fascist, Mahmoud Ahmadhi-Nejad, remains popular in the countryside and among the working class and the peasants. I suspect that these distinctions are overlooked by the Intelligentsia in the West.
In the United States, I believe the chief political event was the second rollout of Governor Sarah Palin of Alaska. In all probability, it was a major success for her. Her main achievement was to get Exxon to sign on to the Alaska Gasline Inducement Act (AGIA), the largest private construction project in the United States and, basically, her baby. This makes will make her a serious player in 2010 and 2012 Republican Politics long after her tiff with David Letterman has passed into history.
Labels: AGIA, Andrew Sullivan, Iran, Republican Party, Sarah Palin
Wednesday, May 27, 2009
Star Trek 90210, and Why it was Necessary
I've seen J.J. Abrams' Star Trek twice. First when it came out, and just again today.
It's a superb piece of entertainment. The pace of the film hides the plot holes and the rather forgettable villain, Nero, played by Eric Bana, does his part to add to the stakes by changing the Trek Universe forever. I won't go through the plot bit by bit here, but what I will say is that Abrams takes an entirely new cast and brings the old Trek characters to life.
He does this by updating Trek for the 21st Century: after all, we have a choice as viewers and fans. We can have this kind of Trek:
....or, we can have our old friends, the fucking Space Hippies.
Which would be that kind of Trek.
We don't want that kind of Trek no more.
Look, I like Sixties Camp as much as the next man. I saw and loved Peter Sellers and Woody Allen in the original Casino Royale, one of David Niven's greatest postwar films. But the notion that you can take great Science Fiction and do a Gene Roddenberry tribute film is simply wrong. They needed to update it, update the ship, and update the personnel.
Yes, the scriptwriters took great liberties in how they got the crew together and how they got James T. Kirk in the center chair right out of the Academy. That doesn't happen in the real world. However, they did create the device of an alternate timeline and actually did the audience the service of explaining it in the dialogue so they could catch the audience (and the Base Trek Fanboys) up to what they were doing.
All of this allows Bob Orci, Mike Kurtzman, David Lindelof, and JJ Abrams to paint a New Trek Universe on a relatively New Canvas, while dealing with some old stuff, such as the Doomsday Machine and the Whale Probe. That's the primary and most important thing they did-they cast off the old Trek universe and allowed themselves to tell new stories with the most compelling characters. It was a well done piece of writing and a nice dodge.
And it worked. The domestic take is up to $200,000,000.00. By the time this thing goes to Blu-Ray Director's Cut it will probably top off at 350 million total. Paramount's bet paid off. It worked most of all with younger audiences. No, it won't beat Harry Potter, but Trek will become one of the top three to four grossing films of the year and set this franchise up as the next Batman series, which is what Paramount wanted.
Sadly, one critic anticipated the presence of the Shat in the film. He was in for a bit of a letdown.
That's right. Hitler found out about the movie, and is he pissed.....
Saturday, May 23, 2009
Bugger All, I've been Tardy!!!!
To catch up on a few things since my last post that I'll post about:
1. The final and overwhelming conclusion about the guilt of I.F. Stone: Soviet Spy.
2. Condi Rice and her friends and Stanford.
3. The Cheney/Obama TortureFest.
4. My review of Star Trek 90210.
Be Seeing You,
Chris
Friday, April 24, 2009
Conscription....
Just a note to say that I'm looking for my team, the Miami Dolphins, to drink some Awesome Sauce and go for a serious run stopper or a linebacker in the First Round.
Go Fins!!!!!
In all seriousness, recent trades have depleted the Secondary of its veterans from the previous regime (something Bill Parcells, Dolphins President of Football Operations probably intended). I suspect you will see concentration on that area of the team as well as the previously mentioned linebacking corps. A brief preview can be found here at The Sports Network page.
Labels: Miami Dolphins, NFL, NFL Draft
